I'm drive I can fine osifer
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
