Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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