you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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