All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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