I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
bring money and cleavage
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
