32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
