I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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