try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
