I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Randomize
