Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
