I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
only if we run a train.
done.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
