she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
as a side note pls kill me
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
