this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
