I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
