u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
