next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
