we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize