i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
