I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
