Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
