For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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