'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
