i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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