Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
