why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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