Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I believe in your delicious
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
