We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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