so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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