I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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