He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
