What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
