Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
