She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'm at about main and main street
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
