garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
