and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
