please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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