Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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