Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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