is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize