i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
