Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
