If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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