Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
