I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
