make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
it's like heaven, but drunker
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize