is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
