I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
