she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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