honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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