she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
