Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
